Opinion | Salt Lake City Weekly

Rep. Trevor Lee’s next target—SLC’s Harvey Milk Boulevard and “Satanic Pride.”

Smart Bomb: The completely unnecessary news analysis
Time to erase all signs of Satan, including the street signs on 900 South in Salt Lake City imprinted with: “Harvey Milk Blvd.” We know the late Harvey Milk was in league with Satan, because a Republican from Layton, Rep. Trevor Lee, told us so.

Utah’s Mike Lee has changed from a choir boy to a MAGA buffoon.

Taking a Gander
You know the saying: “A leopard doesn’t change its spots.” Generally, that statement is one of universal truth. Sadly, Utah is being forced to reconcile the fact that one of its shining stars wasn’t really so shiny at all.

Pentagon pizza index? Something’s up!

Smart Bomb: The completely unnecessary news analysis
Hey Wilson, get this: At about 7 p.m. on Thursday, June 12, @PentagonPizzaReport on X (formerly Twitter) noted that most pizzerias in Arlington, Va. within a mile of the Pentagon were “busier than usual” on Google Maps. One hour later, bombs were raining down on Iran. Coincidence? Not exactly.

Republican lawmakers target a Utah judge for following the laws they wrote.

Opinion
According to recent news reports, Republican Utah lawmakers—led by House Speaker Mike Schultz—are demanding the resignation or impeachment of Judge Don Torgerson after he declined to send a man to prison who pleaded guilty to possession of child sexual abuse material.

Caught between a lovers’ spat, Mike Lee has a meltdown.

Smart Bomb: The completely unnecessary news analysis
Hey Wilson, have you ever had friends who split up? It's horrible for them, of course, but it can also put their acquaintances in a precarious position. Whose side are you on? What did she say? What did he do? Too much information. Yikes!

The failure of American democracy is scientifically predictable.

Taking a Gander
There’s only one thing that we know for sure, and that is that there’s absolutely nothing that we can be sure about.

Utah's federal delegation votes with Trump to neuter the courts.

Smart Bomb: The completely unnecessary news analysis
OK, who do these federal district judges think they are, anyway? They can't just stop a president who was elected by a landslide from doing the people's will.

“War” is no longer the right word for what Israel is doing in Gaza.

Taking a Gander
It happened on October 7, 2023. The world was shocked by the story—how in a concerted, well-planned surprise attack, Hamas had kidnapped 251 hostages and killed over 1,200 innocent Israelis, mostly young revelers who only wanted to attend a music festival.

‘Trumpenfreude’—the joy of a Trump voter’s misfortune.

Smart Bomb: The completely unnecessary news analysis
Hey Wilson, have you ever heard this word, “schadenfreude?” It means taking pleasure or joy from someone else's misfortune. For example: If your mean boss got a flat tire in the rain and showed up at work soaking wet, you would have to rush to the restroom to laugh your ass off. Or if Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem—aka ICE Barbie—was at a burger joint with her grandchildren, and if someone swiped her designer handbag with $3,000 in it, and the Democrats in the Senate cloakroom were overhead saying, “gee, that's terrible,” followed by a lot of snickering.

A fairy tale for Americans and their sorry-assed Trump enablers.

Taking a Gander
Once upon a time, in the shadowed kingdom of Veridia, King Malakor reigned with an iron fist. His decrees were cruel, his taxes crushing, all to fund his opulent lifestyle while his people starved.

Kilby Block Party pulled off Salt Lake's biggest show, in the rain, and they made it look easy.

Opinion
Even the Roman emperors, at the height of their power and excess, couldn't ride a bike to a Weezer concert. Salt Lakers can.

POS—A new acronym for Donald Trump that finally makes sense.

Taking a Gander
When I’d finished my morning toilet duties, I surveyed the contents of the bowl. It was no surprise—nothing so really different than every other time, though I did notice that the color was off a bit. As I pressed the flush button, I heard a desperate call. “Help!” pleaded the voice, “It’s me, Donald, your president.”

Utah Sen. John Curtis scolds Congress for “outsourcing” to the White House.

Smart Bomb: The completely unnecessary news analysis
Hold the phone. Stop the music. Don't look now, but Utah Sen. John Curtis—a one-time Democrat turned Republican—said in a floor speech that Congress should start taking responsibility rather than ceding its constitutional authority to the Trump administration.

Don’t worry America, ICE probably won’t detain you.

Smart Bomb: The completely unnecessary news analysis
So, agents with the U.S. Immigrations and Customs Enforcement (ICE) arrested Newark Mayor Ras Baraka for trespassing in the parking lot of a detention center. It's true that trespassing usually is not an offense that'll get you arrested—you might get a citation—but this is different.

As Trump escalates, more and more Americans will face a test of patriotism.

Taking a Gander
If Donald Trump is allowed to use Supreme Ruler-style extortion and fear as the primary tools of “leadership,” America may well become one of those “shithole” nations that he’s always loved to insult.

The English language will continue to evolve in spite of Trump's Orwellian purge of woke words.

Opinion
"We have met the enemy and he is us." So said Pogo, the titular character in a comic strip syndicated locally in The Salt Lake Tribune during the 1960s and 1970s.

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